« December 2005 | Main | February 2006 »
January 31, 2006
Facial Relationships
After much fanfare and anticipation on my part, I got my first ever professional facial this weekend. As expected, it felt great and left my face feeling open and clean and fresh as a spring daisy. Good thing it was a gift from my generous husband Christopher, ‘cause if I’d have had to pay for it, I’m sure I would have just elected to sit in the lobby and drink cucumber water. Still, it was a fabulous luxury, and the 50 minutes it took literally flew by. I highly recommend one for anyone who has $110 burning a hole in their wallet. Oily skin full of blackheads and ingrown hairs like I have is also helpful.
Part of the facial was the consultation with Sarah, the lovely young lady who did my treatment. She asked what I used to wash my face and when I told her I used St. Ives Apricot Scrub, I swear I heard that “pull the needle off the record” sound effect on the boring ambient mood music being piped into the dimly lit room. Sarah admonished me mightily for using that stuff, saying something I had heard before but didn’t quite believe: using that stuff actually makes you oilier. It strips your skin of its natural oils and so it starts to produce oil overtime to make up for it. Duh! “Only use that apricot stuff on your feet!” she reminded me not too gently.
After steaming, squeezing, sweeping and salving my face, Sarah told me she’d prepared a list of products she recommended for me (any of which I could conveniently pick up at the shop downstairs), and then dropped the bomb. She told me that I should only be washing my face AT NIGHT. You read that right. “Just water in the morning,” she reiterated. She said she’d ‘balanced me out’ with the treatment, and she suggested a gentle cleanser followed by a moisturizer each night before bed, and a protecting moisturizer in the morning, but no washing. Her list actually included a couple other “pore cleansing” treatments for twice weekly use and a couple of other things, but I was still reeling from the “don’t wash your face in the morning” idea.
So… we’re now on day 2 of me only having washed my face at night. My moisturizer collection is not what it should be for a gay man, and the only pore cleansing treatment I have used recently was the apricot scrub, and we saw how that turned out. My face doesn’t feel particularly greasy or anything, but my forehead does seem a tiny bit less shiny.
I wonder if Walgreen’s has any night-time alcohol-free moisturizers on sale this week?
Posted by kyle at 7:00 AM | Comments (6)
January 30, 2006
Is it true what they say about...
This long-awaited new Found Porn post comes from today's Day In Pictures, and is still more proof that white folks in this country are direct descendents of the Puritans.
All fall down: Miami fans get a pocket full of Posey during the Heat-Suns game in Miami.
Don't worry folks. It won't hurt you, and you still have your Beemers.
Posted by kyle at 11:14 AM
January 29, 2006
Let's Turn Back The Clock
Remember women's lib? Remember 'Mizz?' Remember equality for women in society? Well, I do... and so does Wonder Woman. Er, I mean... so did Wonder Woman.
Anyway, my latest review for the Queer Eye on Comics series at the wonderful Prism Comics website is up. See... I've been writing. I just haven't been writing much here. To my legions of fans I say... 'that's what archives are for.'
Posted by kyle at 8:12 AM
January 26, 2006
Cereal Monogamy
The other night, Christopher, Mary and I went out for an impromptu drink after work. Come to think of it, we seem to be going for ‘just one drink’ nearly every Monday evening after work, so I guess we’re only impromptu if it’s a regular thing. Hm.
Anycrap, because we’re pretty much Gen Xers (wise beyond her years, Mary is an honorary one), the topic of conversation inevitably came around to breakfast cereal. You know: what’s your favorite… which taste like sand… which ones can’t stomach anymore now that you’re an adult. If this topic hasn’t come up with you and your friends over drinks, then you must be too busy discussing the finer points of last night’s episode of “According to Jim."
That conversation inspired me to share a list here on the blog; a sort of “What’s Hot and What’s Not” of the Cereal World According to Kyle. What’s a blog for after all, anyway? I’ll leave the reportage to clever folks at Daily Kos, Talking Points Memo and The Jo-Tel*.
With a tip of the hat to those Kellogg’s Variety Packs (the buying of which was like experiencing some kind of kid-Nirvana), and Raisin Bran (which would probably clock in at #11), here are my Top Ten Cereals:
10. Cheerios
This classic is the favorite of the toddlers across the US for a reason: they’re tasty, not too sweet and will stick to you if you eat them with wet hands. Bonus: No milk? No problem!
9. Life
And this means any variety. Again, not too sweet, and it’s a healthy choice that both you and your mom can agree on. And if your mom is still choosing your cereal for you… you’re 37. It’s time to let go.
8. Corn Bran
This cereal isn’t seen very much anymore, but it is seriously delicious. I based my top ten mainly on how much I fondly recalled the taste and texture of each cereal, and I can taste this one now. It was like Corn Pops but without the slimy grossness. Slimy almost never makes for a good cereal.
7. Cracklin’ Oat Bran
The fact that this cereal has “crack” right there in its name is no surprise. Also no surprise is the fact that it is chock full of goodness due to all that palm oil in it. Oh, palm oil… you foul temptress, you!
6. Apple Jacks
Appley goodness, that’s what it packs. Sure they’re a bit sweet, but compared to their perhaps more diverse (color wise) cousins, Fruit Loops, they’re actually better since they actually have a taste (faux apple) as opposed to just being “sweet.” If the subtlety of this comparison is lost on you, go read the paper or something.
5. Mini-Wheats
Back in Pittsburgh, a friend of mine came across an old picture of himself from high school with the most cheap looking non-salon highlights in his hair. He shoved it in front of my face, exclaiming in his best old lady soprano “The FROSting!” Remember that ad? In a related story, this cereal is delicious, and the sugar side must stay oriented UP at all times.
4. Quaker 100% Natural Granola
This cereal proves the adage that if it’s delicious it’s probably bad for you, regardless if the name is Dr. Healthenhiemer’s Whole Body Macrobiotic Life-Lengthening Anti-Oxidant Flakes. Sure it’s 100% Natural. Naturally full of delicious delicious fat.
3. Cap’n Crunch Crunch Berries
Have you noticed that the relative percentage of sugar has been going up as we get closer and closer to my #1 cereal? For all it’s overpowering sweetness and the inevitable mess it makes of the roof of your mouth, Cap’ Crunch is worth it. It has a deliciousness factor so esoteric, it’s hard to really put into words. In that state of perfect softness yet not-softness this cereal is what makes it so… oh, je ne c’est quoi.
2. Lucky Charms/Count Chocula
It’s 2006 people. Let’s face facts: these cereals are identical. Slightly sweet cheerios with “marshmallow” shapes. CC has added the magic of “chocolate,” but essentially they are the same. And by “the same,” I mean scrumptious. Just enough cereal to be passing healthy, and just enough “marshmallow” (aka candy) to make it good eats. I love the slimy on the outside/crunchy on the inside quality of those “marshmallows.” Nothing is so satisfying as crunch-smooshing them between your teeth. PS: Those who object to me lumping two cereals into one spot on this list can get their own list.
1. Cocoa Pebbles
All hail the King of Sugar Cereals! It’s deep chocolateyness will not be diluted! Yea, though you let them soak beyond five minutes, their chocolateyness will not be leeched completely out into the surrounding milk! E’en unto the bottom of the bowl, they will retain their splendor, their sweetness, their rice-but-not-riceness. Woe unto him who filleth his bowl only halfway with their chittering brown presence. He shall wail and gnash his teeth and rend his robes asunder as he sees his roommate finish off the box he could have eaten. It shall be called Wonderful Consumable; Cereal of Cereals, and Pebble of Pebbles. Amen.
Please insert your own “Got Milk” joke here. I’m getting too hungry.
*Please note that The Jo-Tel is a specialty news site, reporting solely on popular culture, Scientology, indie rock, and extremely humiliating stories of guys who visit girls they hook up with at weddings. YMMV.
Posted by kyle at 2:54 PM
January 6, 2006
The Power of Pizza
It's true. I've been in a rather bad mood for the last few days. Post-holiday depression? Workaday malaise? A bad piece of fish? Who knows. But I have been rather a bitch. Sorry!
Today, though, I found something that really dug me, at least temporarily, out of the depths. Anyone who knows me won't be shocked to hear that it was lunch that did it.
Hayes Valley has been an up-and-coming neighborhood as long as I've lived in San Francisco, but the opening of Octavia Boulevard has sealed the deal. Now the restaurants and shops that were there seem to be doing a brisk business even when it's not concert season (the Opera House and Symphony Hall are very nearby), and new spots are opening up faster than Elton John musicals.
One of these new spots is where I found myself for lunch today. Patxi's (say "PAH-cheese") Chicago Pizza is in the spot where Powell's Place used to serve up delicious and authentic Soul Food with a... well, not exactly a smile. Anyhow, Powell's has moved up to the Western Addition, and their old spot got a nice modern renovation and is now home to Patxi's. I'm happy to report that exposed brick still looks cool! Their menu tells me there is another Patxi's (the original?) in Palo Alto on Emerson just off University. Not to sound TOtally elitist, but that's actually a good sign. OK, that did sound elitist.
They sell pizza by the pie or slice, Chicago Style deep dish or thin crust. Now I am usually a thin crust guy, but I hated to miss out on pizza that was obviously their specialty. And hey... I was hungry, and could take any leftovers home with me, and besides... I was depressed! One 10-inch ('serves two' says the menu) full-on deep dish for me with pepperoni (natch), spinach and Kalamata olives. Salty-licious! The staff is eager to please in that "we're a new restaurant, so tell your pals how great we are" kind of way, but that didn't detract.
It did take a while to make (about a half-hour, just as they said it would), so I had a small garden salad to prime the pump. When the pizza finally showed up, it was a marvelous sight to behold. The sides were, like, 6 inches high and it was piled full of cheese, rich tomato sauce and my chosen ingredients. I flung aside the Everyday Food I had been reading and dove in face first.
To put it mildly, this pizza was incredible. I suppose I should make the inevitable comparison to Zachary's, but I'd hate to say one is better. If anything Patxi's deep dish is just a little more... refined than Zachary's, and that may be the stylish environment talking. Whatever -- they're both great, but I don't have to cross over or under a major body of water to get Patxi's. Advantage: Patxi's!
I am hardly ever one to get pizza leftovers wrapped up to go, since no pizza slice is fully safe with me in proximity, but this pizza pwned me. I did manage to finish four elephantine pieces and there are two more are on deck for my next downward mood swing. I'm expecting one any minute now.
Posted by kyle at 3:54 PM | Comments (3)
Belt Protocol Question
After Christmas, I got a really nice brown leather belt on sale (how else) at Le Gap, and now I have a question: do I have to wear this thing with brown shoes? Are sneakers OK? I wouldn't wear it with my black leather shoes, but should I only wear it with brown? It is very casual and should go well with sneakers, but I am afraid the other gays will laugh at me (behind my back, of course).
As you can see, my life is pretty tough.
Posted by kyle at 3:43 PM | Comments (5)
January 2, 2006
Lost: Found
Thanks to my new video iPod, I now have the opportunity to watch TV without a TV. Being only slightly clever when it comes to finding bootleg copies of TV shows online, this means that the choices are limited for now to whatever the iTunes music store is selling. So, I bought the first two episodes of season one of Lost, since so many folks whose opinion I trust one matters televisional have raved about it. The plan was to fire up ol' Blackie (as I have decided maybe to call it) on the flight back to SF yesterday, and watch me some lost.
Here is what I found out:
A. Lost is an awesome TV show. I mean awesome.
2. Despite this fact, it is not such a good idea to watch a show about a plane crash while riding in a plane. Bad idea, Kyle. Bad.
iii. If you must be in a plane crash, be quirky, mysterious, or at least very very sexy. This will likely ensure your survival. Under no circumstances should you be a pilot, since you will die, even if the crash doesn't kill you. And no, that is not a spoiler to anyone who has ever seen almost any episode of Star Trek:TOS or any 1980s horror movie.
Let me add my voices to the legions of fans of this show. Lost is awesome. Watch Lost. Work on the quirky/mysterious/sexy thing when not watching Lost, and then, watch some more Lost.
Posted by kyle at 4:13 PM | Comments (4)
What I'm really saying
Jon Carroll's column on SFGate today is a nice summation of how I see just about all the debates surrounding Our Esteemed Leader these days.
Who decides what measures are necessary to keep America safe?The president.
Who has oversight over the actions of the president?
The president oversees his own actions. If at any time he determines that he is a danger to America, he has the right to wiretap himself, name himself an enemy combatant and spirit himself away to a secret prison in Egypt.
Good stuff. Read up!
Posted by kyle at 3:56 PM | Comments (1)